Laugh Till You Cry....

I did!

http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/


The genius....

to get you through the hard times....

some of my hilarity recently:

speaking of a TALL kickballer on another team in our league: i feel like sex with him would be like twister... with limbs just flying everywhere

to my roommate today on gchat:
i'm soo broke
i fed the dogs brown rice, eggs, and cottage cheese for breakfast
they thought they were getting a treat
little did they know, their mom is a broke ass ho

to my friend BG who just had half his palate burned off: and if you EVER ignore my text message again, i will shoot you in the face.... (his visiting sister looks properly terrified)

nate, regarding drama on my kickball team: what are y'all, in third grade.... wow, this really IS kickball

me, at kickball: hey ray-ray, you know how you wore your lucky boxers? i have on my lucky panties! (show the front of my blue and pink superwoman pantaloons) / kim: wow! i think every guy on this field just got hard....

at kickball (again), Jake commenting sarcastically on how he wasn't raised by filthy rich people who could afford him the opportunity to play kickball in diamond earrings, ashleigh n: well, were you raised by a pack of assholes?!

to andy: oh fake lover, i would love to fake hate you....

Operation Lizard Lick


Oh HAI!!!!!!

enjoy the rest of your summers!

wow.... just... wow

So, I got a new job Friday. I was very excited about it... or as excited as one can be when the last three weeks have deepened my melanin production to extremes not seen since I got 3 months of summer vacation every year. I said goodbye to the pool and prepared to reacquaint myself with Gchat and other perks of the 9-5 lifestyle. It was a bittersweet moment as I roused myself from slumber at 7:45 am and blearily prepared my lunch. Nervous anticipation prickled... I may have even sweat a little on the drive over...

Nothing, and I do mean NOTHING, could have prepared me for the workplace that I entered. My desk is covered in files, mail, trash, messages dating back to godknowswhen. There are bags and bags of trash in the room next to the front that apparently no one has taken out. The office itself is dirty and unclean. I was here 5 minutes and my boss left! No training, no direction other than just open and organize the mail.... so, I have been doing nothing for about 3 hours now, since that took next to no time to complete. The only other 2 people in the office are just as lost as I, since one started yesterday and one began just 6 months ago.

So, I begin to open the mail and there are close to 25 collection notices! Every other phone call is a collection agency. I am now really worried that I am working for a company that is on the verge of bankruptcy. When I interviewed, I was told that there were some financial concerns, but that it was the result of a previous employee not collecting past due bills from clients. I am seriously questioning that within one day of working here.... I spoke to the employee that has been here for 6 months and he recommended that I speak with the owner, indicating that my concerns may have validity.

Sending out more resumes.... good grief...